Hello!! I've been meaning to write this post for at least a week and have been so busy with life. In reference to my previous post, God gave me so many words of encouragement through so many different people to make it through that hard rejection. I am so grateful that we serve a loving God that cares enough to make sure we are ok. : )
But the story doesn't end there. The ladies at church started a Facebook group that we can discuss certain devotionals since we don't have a particular women's class at church. When I had my "aha" moment Friday, I shared it with them and was so encouraged by their comments. But I still felt like I should share it with more people. I thought, maybe during Sunday School I could share it because if you know me, talking in front of large groups is the worst!!!! So, Sunday came and I just didn't feel like I should share it then. It didn't go with the lesson and back again to the whole not liking to talk to people, I just blew it off.
Well, fast forward to the sermon that day. Our Pastor has been going over the book Haggai and that particular day was over Haggai 2:20-22. He talked of the word that God gave Zerubbabel, a timely word that said to quit focusing on the rubble and to focus on God. Ya'll, have you ever had an experience like this? My Pastor spoke the exact words I've been hearing for the last couple of weeks. He also said that it's a personal word just for us, that can resurrect our faith. We just have to persevere. I had goosebumps, started sweating and thought that I had to shared my testimony...IN CHURCH. He went on to say it's a powerful word that will not return void and that we can use it as a weapon against Satan. Maybe I was wrong, maybe I didn't HAVE to share it to church, but I didn't want to disappoint him...uuhhhh. And finally, it's a productive word. It reminds us that we are chosen and highly favored of God. They were words of affirmation, that God truly cares for me and that I have to have faith He will do amazing things for me. During the sermon, I wrote down a couple of things I had wanted to "say" but still wasn't sure.
By the time he got to the invitation, I was about to throw up. I knew that God wanted me to share my story and my recent bible study talked about being faithful with little, so God can trust us with the big was resonating in my head! So, I walked up to the front feeling as though electric volts were going through my body. I was shaking and I asked my pastor if I could give my testimony. He told me after invitation was over I could speak. Again, I HATE talking in front of people especially large groups. (As I'm writing this I am starting to feel antsy again!!) I start sweating and stuttering and feel as though my voice wavers...it's not pretty. Do you know I don't think I said anything I wrote down. I felt as though I didn't get the message out correctly or even coherently and sort of felt dumb that I couldn't get it together. But I just knew that God wanted me to get up there.
That night, my friend called and told me she was so glad that I got up there because she had been praying about something at the exact moment I got up there. She asked God to give her a word and my testimony was what she needed. God is so crazy and I feel he has to have an amazing sense of humor to use someone like me. So unequipped and fearful and really lame, to further his kingdom. I am so glad I trusted him because if not, my friend wouldn't have gotten that message she needed. It's the little things, people. Little steps of faith that could become something so big. I can't wait to see how God uses me for his glory! Have a great day!!!
"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." 2 Corinthians 12:9